Why does love go away

People are confusing heartbreak with anger, sadness, or 'obsession' of past love gone. Let me correct you, this world is obsessed with love: you, me, him, her.

People who are not heartbroken are obsessed with love -- with keeping it. So, the heartbroken aren't a disease that can't be cured -- the heartbroken are the strongest most beautiful misunderstood group. They have loved and lost, been alone and grown. They search for many answers, especially: "Where does our love go when we break up? Love doesn't go away, it doesn't have feet it can't run. Those feelings created, molded for that one person don't disappear overnight, they seem to be left lingering in the air -- nowhere to go, the love is left in a directionless way hoping to find its way back to them, but more so it doesn't make it and you are left heartbroken -- feeling lost, wandering to get back home.

But remember there is a bond between you and this person that is unique, that is unlike anyone else -- and that love will always be there, not just in you, but in them as well. What if they have moved on you might ask? You feel hurt, you feel like this person must be better than you, you start to tear yourself apart piece by piece.

Let me stop your self-abuse right now. No one can compete with the love you two had. That new person who you think replaced you -- didn't. One of the reasons love can fade over time is that it's hard to keep that dopamine buzz going.

Lieberman says. Choosing to remain attached to your partner , even once the dopamine buzz fades, is also driven by chemicals, just a different set. But even though chemicals drive both passionate and companionate love, it's clear that choosing to remain with the same person is a choice.

Each time the music stops and your feet are back on the ground, you must make a choice: take one more whirl, or cross that bridge to another, more enduring kind of love. In that realm, attachment, your love is driven not just by a dopamine buzz, but by deciding to appreciate someone in the here and now, day after day.

When we speak about "love fading", we're actually talking about passionate love specifically. But some people think that once the dopaminergic thrill of passionate love is gone, the relationship is over.

The relationship can continue — and even thrive — but in order to do so it's important to understand that being with the same person every day will mean that the passionate love fades. But that doesn't mean that there's no reward in that familiarity.

Even though settling into companionate love has its benefits as passion fades, that doesn't mean that dopamine is totally off the table.

To keep that spark, create dopamine-driven experiences that you can enjoy together. Your feelings will just continue to grow deeper over the years.

The result is a happier, stronger and longer lasting relationship. This is the ultimate love. Follow A. Pawlowski on Facebook , Instagram and Twitter. IE 11 is not supported. For an optimal experience visit our site on another browser. Share this —. Follow today. More Brands.